Snow Worries

So it snowed and everyone died in a terrible cold water related accident.

That is what you would think had happend if you had watched any rolling news channel or picked up a news paper in the last few weeks. The truth is that the country is totally unprepared to cope with a foot of snow and even an inch in some areas.

Every year seems to be the same as local councils somehow manage to forget that every year snow needs to be taken seriously and precautions need to be taken.

Well, you know its easy for me to sit here and critiscise the government, simply because they are shit.

Dont get me wrong I understand that it must be difficult to predict when it will snow, where it will snow and how much it will snow because its not like we have people who's only job it is to handle this is it?

Americant But English Can

It seems to me when I look at the best television shows coming out of America within the last few years a hell of a lot of the actors are English or British.

The first series that comes to mind is The Wire. Not only was it and maybe still is the best show on television but it featured a wealth of British actors in major roles.

The first and most important is the character Jimi who is played by Dominic West. He is not only sort of the lead character but a bloody good and important one too.

For those who haven't seen the series first of all, what the fuck have you been doing with yourself for the last 8 years! Secondly James Mcnaulty is a sort of typical American/Irish piss bead. He enjoys such things as drinking his trademark Jameson whisky, pissing on railway lines, befriending stick up kids and singing along to the pogues. He is the glue that holds the show together for 4 of it's 5 series.

This is not the only character in this great show to hail from Britain as Stringer bell, (Idris Elba) the smart business school educated and drug dealing gangster is somehow from London and recently had his own show Luther, Which received mixed reviews.

Now I know what you who haven't seen the series are thinking, these guys must play bumbling Hugh Grant types in this series but it is the complete opposite as they play full blooded beef jerky chewing and budlight swigging Americans! Well maybe not bud light but they defiantly are convincing.

These are not the only people that pop up in the show who are of British origin by any means. The eventual mayor of the city of Baltimore, Vincent carcetti is also a British boy having been born and lived in Ireland for much of his life. Also having a major role in that show queer as folk. Remember that from the 90s?

Other notable English or British actors toilig in the American T.V business include Hugh laurie in house, Sonia Walger in lost, Damien Lewis in the brilliant Band Of Brothers and Natasha mcelhone in Californication, to name a few.

Long gone are the days where actors like Christopher Ecklestone have to play annoying English guys like in gone in 60 seconds, which also features Vinnie Jones for some reason. British actors are right up there in both American tv and American film.

I could go on about Stephen Graham in the new Boardwalk Empire and all the other British actors in Band Of Brothers but you would get bored so I won't.

Was He a Good Guy?

Yes he tried to blow up the houses of parliament but would it have been a good thing and by celebrating his death are we doing the right thing? Also do we actually celebrate his death or has this day become like Christmas and just a money making commercial rip off with shit fireworks?

I have started with a lot of questions in this blog and to be honest I would be surprised if I managed to answer any let alone all of them.

So I start the only way I can and that is with my personal opinion about this subject. This however is harder than I thought it would be, being that I actually have very little knowledge of these events. Now I know what you are thinking this is most out of the ordinary for one of my blogs and I agree, I usually am in possession of all of the salient pieces of information but this time I'm gonna wing it!

As I understand guy fawks was a bit of a bin laden of his time and thought "I don't like those politicians so I'm gonna blow them up". This is where my facts run out.

I have found out since typing the first half of this essay, and it is an essay, that Fawkes wanted to kill the king for religious reasons.

Now I was annoyed when I discovered this as I was thinking he was a guy who wanted to show something to the world and change it for the better, where as in reality him and his mates on parliament hill just wanted a guy, or more accurately a girl and even more accurately the kings daughter, who followed their deluded religious beliefs, in the hot seat.

As we all know he and his gang did't succeed in their mission. The punishment I feel was harsh even taking into account that they tried to kill the king.

Anyway I'm getting ahead of myself. Guy was captured and tortured until he gave up the names of his accomplices, which he did after days of unimaginable pain. The sentence they were handed was death after being found guilty of high treason.

However the king was pissed and decided to not only kill them but quite literally cut their genitals off and burn them in front of their eyes, followed by a spot of hang draw and quartering, followed by bowel removal and ending in making them watch an entire series of the Catherine Tate show. One of these punishments is made up.

Guy Fawkes didn't fancy any of the above so took a dive off the top of the hanging gallery and broke his neck.

The king was a little annoyed by this and decided to still inflict the punishment on Guy even though he was actually dead and would no longer be bothered by it.

Well now for the conclusion... Guy Fawkes was a bit naughty trying to kill the king but cutting a guys nuts off and making him watch them burn? Seems harsh.

Cheryl Cole "the nation's new sweetheart"

We all love her don't we? The way she is on T.V every 7.8 seconds in adverts talking on The X factor and crying on chat shows because her life has been so hard. BOOO HOOO!

However all that aside here is something most people are not aware of about our new Princess Diana.

Cheryl started her tabloid life in the year of our lord 2002 when she was herself competing on a reality show and finally ending up in the manufactured pop group Girls Aloud. It wasn't until the following year that she really started to show her true colours(that last sentence will be funny when you read the next bit).

Yes.. Anyway I was talking about how Cheryl "the nations new sweetheart" Cole , got herself into the papers. On 11 January 2003 Cheryl Cole then known as Cheryl Tweedy(I know its complicated but do persevere), was involved in an "altercation" with a nightclub toilet attendant named Sophie Amogbokpa in Guildford. Cheryl "the nations new sweetheart" Cole was subsequently charged with racially aggravated assault. You want to know why she was charged with racially aggravated assault, well I will tell you why because she called Sophie Amogbokpa a "Caribbean jigaboo" and a "black bitch".

Now I have a problem with all of this but the fact that she used the words "Caribbean jigaboo" shows that it wasn't a crime of passion and it just slipped out but a carefully planned and rehearsed verbal and physical attack. I mean who in the heat of passion during a fight would have a quick enough brain to think of such a specific racial insult and we all know she is from Newcastle so isn't the brightest of people either.

So there you have it England the nations sweetheart is a Racist. Its true you cant argue with a blog because it wouldn't be on the internet if it wasn't true!

The jury found her guilty of assault occasioning actual bodily harm, but cleared her of racially aggravated assault.

George Osborne: '"It will always pay to work"

• £81bn cut from public spending over four years
• 19% average departmental cuts - less than the 25% expected
• £7bn extra welfare cuts, including changes to incapacity, housing benefit and tax credits
• £3.5bn increase in public sector pension employee contributions
• Rise in state pension age brought forward
• 7% cut for local councils from April next year
• Permanent bank levy
• Rail fares to rise 3% above inflation from 2012

I didn't vote in the election..... so that means this isn't my fault right?

Wane Rooney?

No I didn't just spell his name wrong. Think about it for a second..... yes well done you figured it out.

So Wayne Rooney has said he wants to leave Manchester United and everyone is going crazy in the football world about it while at the same time conveniently forgetting about him sleeping with two prostitutes while his wife was pregnant.

Now a lot of people are say and writing things like, why? how dare he? They are also writing all the other things newspapers like to ask questions about but no one seems to realise the truth.

The simple truth is that a footballer is in most cases a complete idiot. When I say this I am not having a go at them but stating some facts. The reasons for this are that these guys do not live lives like us, they do not have worries like us, they don't have to do everything for themselves and they are under educated.

Take for example a football player who is 24 years old, as Rooney is, for the last 8-10 years of his life has had people telling him he is amazing and he can do anything he wants. They also throw money at him in the hundreds of thousands each week. They handle his money, they tell him things he wants to hear, they negotiate huge and ridiculous wage rises, get people to do their shopping and take care of all the mundane things that keep people grounded and ultimately normal. So anyone might be slightly messed up mentally if they had no real responsibilities in life and no real worries other than kicking a ball into a goal.

It seems to me that a guy like Wayne Rooney might lose his grasp on reality a little when he earns upwards of £200000 a week. Also you have to think about what he can spend it all on because drugs are out of the window as he cant because of the football and all that.

So for me the only other thing to spend the money of is sex workers of the female variety.

Anyway I am going off topic slightly. The question I asked at the beginning was Wayne Rooney going down in popularity?

Well the answer is yes he is going down in popularity and rightly so as he is only a fucking football player! He gives nothing of any worth to the world. He is a disposable shell of a human that will be replaced when the next young guy comes along.

He doesn't even have any redeeming features like some football players such as David Beckham as women don't fancy Wayne Rooney and we know this because he had to pay them to sleep with him.

So Wayne move to Real Madrid like the last two Manchester United Players who fell out with Sir Alex and be done with it. You are boring me now. Oooh I want to leave boo hoo. Fuck off!

"Just Look At These Scenes"

I woke up this morning on Wednesday the 13th of October 2010 and picked up my laptop. I then went onto Facebook and had a little look at what people have put on their status in an attempt to seem more interesting than they actually are. Then after this went on to the BBC website and saw that the 33 Chilean miners had started to be rescued from the mine that has kept them prisoner for the past few months.

Now this was genuinely emotional and quite beautiful to see a working class guy who has gone through a terrible ordeal finally reunited with his wife and children. The thing that did slightly spoil it was the fact that it was being broadcast on the most annoying of news formats ,that I am sure you are familiar with, BBC News 24.

The main reason I get annoyed while watching Live rolling news is because nothing happens for a long time and there is air time to fill so the commentator has to endlessly fill the void in excitement with inane musings and shear conjecture about what may or may not happen.

I don't know who the guy was that commentated on this but I found myself being taken out of the moment and its genuine emotion and catapulted into an irrelevant, disposable, shamelessly and needlessly heart string pulling, manipulative, disgracefully over hyping and sometimes incomprehensible sentence filled reality show.

I was actually annoyed while happy and touched at the same time which was odd. It seems to be the case on news channels that things don't happen quickly live and it is the job of the person commentating to fill the gaps of nothing happening with stupid rhetorical questions and endless suspense building finally culminating in removing all emotion and actual excitement from the sometimes quite extraordinary scenes by saying such insightful things like "he looks happy" or "she is crying" which are obvious to even the most dimwitted of news viewers of which I am sure there are many.

So thank you live BBC News coverage for spoiling what could have been a beautiful moment of TV history by having a posh bloke saying "Just look at these faces around here, everyone watching these moments." and "look at these moments now the men embracing each other, the men exhausted". I mean we get it. We understand how fucking lucky they are to get out alive and how big a deal it is to be freed so why endlessly hammer home that point with all the eloquence of a drunk toothless cabbie from Essex!

There really should be an option to turn off the stupid guy ruining most live news broadcasts. Then I suppose there is and its called the mute button.